Prologue: Some Context
Part 1—Relevant Sections of the Nazarene Manual—ie. The Doctrines and Rules
Human Sexuality and Marriage – MANUAL 2017–2021 (nazarene.org) All sexual activity ought to be confined to the ‘covenantal union’ between one man and one woman. The call to ‘sexual purity is costly.’ The rest of verbiage allows for the practice of ‘conversion therapy’ although that is not specifically stated. Any ‘inappropriate sexual bonding… potentially harms our ability to enter into the beauty and holiness of Christian marriage with our whole selves.’ Purity Culture is thus approved. Youth group here come the chewed gum and spittle cup analogies…
Sanctity of Human Life – MANUAL 2017–2021 (nazarene.org) ‘We oppose all laws that allow abortion.’ Then they go on to say that abortion is forbidden except if it can be determined whether the mother or the developing child (or both) will not survive the pregnancy. And only then after both medical advice and Christian counseling. This opposes the ‘all laws’ part but who is keeping track?
The Christian Life – MANUAL 2017–2021 (nazarene.org) 28.2 ‘The historic ethical standards of the church are expressed in part in the following items. They should be followed carefully and conscientiously as guides and helps to holy living. Those who violate the conscience of the church do so at their own peril and to the hurt of the witness of the church. Culturally conditioned adaptations shall be referred to and approved by the Board of General Superintendents.’ In other words, church leadership claims the right to determine what right way is for you to live your life. Skipping to what should be avoided includes…
29:1 Any media that isn’t specifically ‘Christian’ to be on the safe side. Avoiding anything which promotes the ‘philosophy of secularism’ is specifically mentioned. That could be just about anything. But again, a lot of things claim to be Christian, like Christian Nationalism for instance, are not. It’s all in packaging I suppose. ‘…whatever weakens your reason’ is the teaching of evangelicalism itself. But that’s just a newly minted secular talking.
29:2 Gambling. But I’ve never been tempted by that. They don’t turn on the lights by giving away money.
29:3 No joining ‘quasi-religious’ organizations of any kind. Defining this is unclear so your leadership gets to decide this as well.
29:4 ‘All forms of dancing that detract from spiritual growth and break down proper moral inhibitions and reserve.’ They are serious about this one. Better not wriggle in any way to be on the safe side.
29:5 No alcohol or tobacco. Lots of Nazarenes drink, trust me. This newly minted secular is enjoying a beer right now without the burden of believing I’m violating the temple of the Holy Spirit.
29:6 No damn drugs! Retirement is wonderful and marijuana is legal! Not worried about this anymore either.
A few things about how the church is defined, its authority, and the penalties for crossing it.
17. ‘The Church of God is composed of all spiritually regenerate persons, whose names are written in heaven.’ This apparently, at first glance, includes all the various denominations who sometime strongly disagree with each other on matters of practice and belief and all those again who claim to know Jesus and that God speaks to them as well despite the contradictory (and just flat out false) proclamations. These strong disagreements naturally lead to questioning the status of your opponent’s state of ‘spiritual regeneration’ and whether God speaks to them or not. Just the way it is.
20.2 ‘The Old and New Testament Scriptures, given by plenary inspiration, contain all truth necessary to faith and Christian living.’ Except many of the beliefs and practices in the church claimed to be ‘biblical,’ but are not, are later imports from such scary ideas encompassed in the ‘philosophy of secularism’ if one should listen to Bible scholars on the matter. I believe the Bible most certainly promotes the patriarchy and has been rigorously employed in the past to promote all sort of horrid things like violence, racism, and slavery. Since the Bible does not speak with one voice (I spent decades trying to figure out how it could) we can make the Bible say anything we want it to say. All Christians pick out what they like and forget the rest. Just the way it is. (It was hard to walk away from all my ‘sunk cost.’)
20:3 ‘Human beings are born with a fallen nature, and are, therefore, inclined to evil, and that continually.’ This teaching leads to wonderful little sermons which proclaim, ‘Without Christ, our hearts are desperately wicked.’ The conclusion is that the only way to be good is to be ‘spiritually regenerate.’ Therefore, those who are not spiritually regenerate must speak out of a depraved mind and so are not worthy of being heard as an equal. This belief led to the white savior complex in which the ‘spiritually regenerate’ assume authority over everyone else for their own good. Yesterday this was called colonialism, today the idea continues as it is now called Christian Nationalism in its various forms. All of us evil folk point back at your institutions, the corruption, embezzlement, abuse of power, theft, lies, violence, conspiracies, racism, and cover-ups in which you all will do nothing to police those abuses but rather to continue in your denials and condescending paternalisms to merely continue the abuse. Moreso, you all are actively making laws to forbid those who are not you, the righteous, from talking about things you, our benevolent fathers, do not like. I’m getting ahead of myself here but fuck you.
20:4 ‘The finally impenitent are hopelessly and eternally lost.’
16:2. ‘… the finally impenitent shall suffer eternally in hell.’ There is no sugar coating this, most of the people who have ever lived or ever will live, according to common Christian belief, are going to suffer in fire for eternity. There are disagreements about predestination, but this is, by far, the majority belief even though most of the modern ideas about Hell come from Dante and Milton. The rest of them spring out of a horrifying book known to Christians as Revelation. Jesus is coming and he is pissed! This is the love of the Christian God.
21 ‘…they shall show evidence of salvation from their sins by a godly walk and vital piety.’ Followed by a lot of rules (many of them good ones.) The point is, one must show evidence according to the dictates of the church body because ‘Those who violate the conscience of the church do so at their own peril.’ 28:2. Cross the church, you never know… refer to the Lake of Fire.
7. ‘[But we also believe that the grace of God through Jesus Christ is freely bestowed upon all people, enabling all who will to turn from sin to righteousness, believe on Jesus Christ for pardon and cleansing from sin, and follow good works pleasing and acceptable in His sight.]
[We believe that all persons, though in the possession of the experience of regeneration and entire sanctification, may fall from grace and apostatize and, unless they repent of their sins, be hopelessly and eternally lost.]’
Two points here: First, salvation is both a matter of proper belief and practice. Second, you can be cast into eternal fire even if one has attained the nebulous rank of being ‘entirely sanctified.’ (Some put it that in that state one doesn’t sin, people so sanctified just occasionally make mistakes. The doctrine never made sense to me.) Don’t believe and do the right things, you’re eternally cast into indescribable agony. This widespread belief gives the church a lot of power to control people by promoting anxiety about their eternal condition. (While at the same time claiming they are relieving that anxiety. In any case, don’t think too deeply about it. Just believe and obey.) Promises of bigger houses and crowns in Heaven work to get people to give, work, and obey as well. (Apparently, there is a class system in heaven.)
With some context given, I now can move on to the second part of the introduction preceding the more specific commentary on Pastor Matt’s June 4, 2023 sermon on manipulation and manipulators.
Bad Blood – Manipulative People: Mark 16:21-23 (Pastor Matt Bissonnette) – YouTube
In a stunning display of a lack of self-awareness, self-reflection, or even a tinge of irony, Bissonette’s Bad Blood sermon series delves into the realm of manipulation and how to deal with manipulative people. Having himself defined manipulation as coming from those who weaponize guilt, obligation, and threats, he seemed blissfully unaware that evangelical Christianity is built upon those very things. If one should not submit to the authority of the church, however contradictory, seemingly corrupt and/or immoral the doctrines and practices in the church appear to be, the threat of eternal hellfire always remains no matter how much they try to deny it. Believers must, for their own peace of mind, must adhere to some set of ‘proper’ beliefs and behaviors to demonstrate evidence of regeneration and entire sanctification as both the leadership and Christian culture at large defines. Uncertainty and anxiety abound.
Another general observation of just how disconnected the sermon was, to put this in context, ‘Secrets of Hillsong’ was released on Hulu in the past few weeks. For those who have been following the Hillsong cesspool saga, the 4-part series featured, and was very sympathetic to, Carl Lentz. For those in the know, Carl Lentz did horrible, manipulative, abusive things to the people who worked for him; the issue went far beyond him getting it on with other women other than his wife. Yet, if all you saw was poor Carl who was given the spotlight in the documentary, you’d feel sorry for him. You might be tempted to think he deserves to be reinstated because he kept his marriage together. Indeed, he has been hired as an ‘advisor’ by another church. You’d think the fact that there are people who worked for Carl who will never step foot in a church again because of what was done to them, that wouldn’t look good on Carl’s resume. But no, churches want that charisma no matter who Carl has hurt. Of course, churches are going to hire him (as well as many other ‘fallen’ abusive pastors) because he brings the masses in to meet Jesus (and rake in the dough.) The journalists at Vanity Fair admitted they didn’t understand what they were dealing with—a master manipulator. Yet Matt, in his sermon, did not mention this huge, very current, and glaringly relevant example. No. He put out this example, one spouse says to the other, ‘If you don’t start paying attention to me, I’m going to get attention elsewhere.’ Really Matt? Ever think how that little example could get weaponized?
There is some truth to the adage that ‘Ignorance is bliss.’ This is why the Bible should be read ‘devotionally’ to not raise too many questions. This is why sermons tend to be shallow and/or misleading. To keep this simple, regarding the eternal threat, the importance of proper belief is paramount in evangelicalism. Stray too far ‘at your own peril.’ There are passages in the Bible which can be used to show Christians are not safe from punishment if they do not hold the correct beliefs. For example, in that wonderful little book of Revelation, Jesus says to ‘Jezebel,’ a Christian leader, that because she teaches people to practice sexual immorality (which is Ill defined, non-specific, and the original Greek is terrible, so this could mean anything—like non-procreative sex between married couples for all we know) and eating meat sacrificed to idols (which Paul said was not that big a deal as he waffled back and forth on that issue,) Jesus was going to throw her onto a bed, men were going to have sex with her (Rape? Again, we don’t know because the language is poor and non-specific,) and then Jesus was going to kill her babies as a punishment for the men. This means you better get your doctrines straight or the Almighty is going to do terrible things to you.
In the modern context, now that sexual orientation is a more defined concept, those liberal Christians who are ‘affirming’ of LGBTQ people may be that ‘Jezebel’ that Jesus is going to punish. Sexual immorality could include just about anything other than a husband with his wife, penis in vagina, for the purpose of making babies. The Bible is anything but clear on what kind of sex is okay. Onan wasted his seed? How do you interpret that? The notions of ‘Biblical Marriage’ are modern appropriations. The words ‘husband and ‘wife’ did not appear in the original languages; those words are used in modern translation to meet our modern sensibilities.
In the good, ole ‘Bible Days,’ marriage was a man having sex with a woman to claim her (and her slaves if she had them. The man may have to negotiate a deal with the father. Or they could be taken as loot in war. Men could have sex with all kinds of women without God getting mad about it at all. Adultery was a property crime. Think about that. That is patriarchy for you. That is ‘biblical marriage.’
Modern ideas about marriage are just that, modern. ‘Purity Culture,’ an oppressive evangelical invention has done incalculable damage to people’s sex lives by filling them with guilt and shame about normal drives and desires. It commodifies future brides by supposing virginity is a gift to their future husbands. We’ve told our young people that the fate of the nation depends on their sexual purity. We pile on the guilt and expectations to suppress, suppress, suppress, to then suppose everything will be magical once the fathers and the preacher have said it’s okay for two people to have sex. News flash: it doesn’t work that way. In reality, such guilt, shame, and repression can cripple married sex lives. Even lust, a thought crime, is seen as a sin grave as adultery. As the hormones rage, how many times can one masturbate before being in danger of the fires of hell? This kind of teaching is very manipulative as it uses guilt and shame concerning very human feelings as a means a control. Purity Culture is not about helping people, it is about human control over other humans.
(‘Rapture Anxiety’ is such a serious and common phenomenon. This is one reason why people commonly say the ‘sinner’s prayer’ time, and time again because they don’t want to be caught at a time with unconfessed sin. How many people have rubbed one out to then find people in their life unexpectedly missing to then think they had ‘missed the cut’ and so will have to face the horrors of the Great Tribulation. A lot. Welcome to the ‘Blessed Assurance.’)
Continuing with doctrines which in modern evangelical thought can be threatening to one’s eternal fate if one does not get it right, there is abortion. The Bible itself has nothing to say on the matter specifically. There are passages which may shed some insight as to the value of the fetus. One describes a situation in two men are fighting with each other and a woman gets injured as a result. If she is pregnant, and she loses the baby as a result, the offender must pay a fine to the husband. It is apparently a crime against property. If the woman dies as a result, then the offender is guilty of murder. Life for life. Forward to modern Jewish thought, the fetus itself is not regarded as an individual life separate from until the baby’s head emerges from the birth canal. Furthermore, the appropriation of scripture to suit your own purposes is offensive. As Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg puts it, “Most of the proof texts that they’re bringing in for this are ridiculous. They’re using my sacred text to justify taking away my rights in a way that is just so calculated and craven.”
Abortion laws: Jewish faith teaches life does not start at conception (usatoday.com)
Another possibly relevant passage involves a (screwed up) ceremony which can be done if a woman is suspected of being unfaithful to her man. (How’d that go? ‘The Bible is complete and sufficient for living the Christian life.’ Or something like that.) As a part of the ceremony, the priest administers ‘bitter water’ to the woman. We are told that if she has been unfaithful the baby inside her will die. All this springs out of a man’s world and the offense to his (perceived) dignity and property. The fetus is not treated as an individual human life with rights. The New Testament does not mention the matter. (Although Jesus kills babies to punish the Jezebel. See Revelation 2:20-23.)
The point here is not to argue the ethics of sex and abortion but to show there is serious division amongst Christians themselves on these issues. Amid the chaos as we’re calling each other apostates and Jezebels, the big boys are running a con which involves driving wedges to exploit the gaps. The Godfather of the Christian Right and Christian powerhouse Pat Robertson said, “’You’re supposed to be nice to Episcopalians, Presbyterians and Methodists … Nonsense. I don’t have to be nice to the spirit of the Antichrist.”
Pat Robertson Is Dead but His Dystopian Legacy Lives On – Rolling Stone
Charlatan, grifter, liar, prolific false prophet, and generally hateful to anyone not his brand of Christian, Pat Robertson is now in heaven strumming his harp, eating grapes, and having a good time. Pat, despite all the horrible things he said and did throughout his life, had the money and power to spread his lies and bullshit far and wide so that every good Christian should regard Pat as a holy man. People fear the name of Jesus when it is invoked by these con-artists and revere confidently delivered bullshit. The ‘name of Jesus’ trumps and covers over the obvious lies. That is how ‘Christian’ religious manipulation works. The sheep are star-struck by the appearance of success and power believing, thanks to the spread of the prosperity gospel, that God must be behind that success. They join up to ‘build the kingdom,’ send lots of money, and the power of the con amplifies to the point where they can take over the government to make people do what holy men say we all ought to do. Grifters like Donald Trump get in on the mass action to murder the possibility of truth in order to cash in and grab even more power. Does Matt talk about any of this? Nope. He talks about domestic things like ‘the silent treatment.’ That’s the threat…
The threat, Matt (getting personal now,) lies within an authoritarian, hierarchical religious structure which actively seeks to destroy discernment. You do this by teaching your folks that ‘God’ will tell them what to do as to the specifics of whatever situations they may face. I’ve always hated that teaching even before I apostatized. I hate it ever more because it imprisons your folks to only seek answers within their own acceptable circles because everyone who is not perceived as them and theirs are evil. ‘Without Christ our hearts are desperately wicked.’ It seems then that ‘God’ doesn’t speak to those people who do not hold the proper beliefs—even among the people who identify as Christians. You teach this. That was the gist of your sermon on dealing with criticism. ‘The loudest boos come from the cheapest seats.’ (Again, fuck you.) You told your people that when they hear something critical, they should chew on it and the Holy Spirit will tell them to spit it out. This lazy, selfish, stupid advice allows these name-of-Jesus invoking predators the safety to feed because the determination of truth is based on feelings. You teach people that their seemingly infinitely complex, malleable, and contradictory feelings are the voice of God. Cherry pick some scriptures to back what you’re feeling and voila! God has spoken.
Although those feelings are generated through innumerable factors, the central human need to experience acceptance by our own group guides and molds our feelings and behaviors to meet the ‘acceptable’ expectations of the group; we are social animals. As such, as now amplified by various mass and social media, safety is found through remaining loyal to the group within ever-tightening circles driven by peer-pressure; we are tribal. Within those tribes, charismatic and assertive folks exert influence on others and those not so strong willed acquiesce to the leadership to satisfy the need to belong and feel safe.
Within the Christian context, the sheep are told, ‘you are chosen,’ ‘you are loved,’ ‘you are forgiven,’ ‘they are wicked,’ ‘they are out to get you,’ ‘God is punishing this nation because of our toleration of their sin,’ ‘The mainstream media lies,’ ‘The fate of our nation lies with the sexual purity of our youth,’ ‘Trump is God’s chosen wrecking ball,’ ‘God wants you to be prosperous,’ ‘God wants your total obedience,’ ‘Everything happens for a reason,’ ‘Jesus is coming soon,’ ‘The rapture is going to happen (pick a year,)’ ‘Let go and let God,’ ‘God is cleaning you up from the inside out,’ ‘God told me Trump is going to win a second term,’ ‘The election was stolen,’ ‘America was founded as a Christian nation,’ ‘No one who is born of God sins (1 John 5:18,)’ ‘Christianity is united in Christ,’ ‘Non-Christians are termites,’ ‘God cannot lie,’ ‘feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.’
Pat Robertson Is Dead but His Dystopian Legacy Lives On – Rolling Stone
‘Love your enemies,’ ‘Love the sinner, hate the sin,’ ‘God is a capitalist,’ ‘God’s love is unconditional,’ ‘God is going send everyone who doesn’t believe in Jesus to Hell,’ ‘Rob Bell is heretic,’ ‘Judge not lest ye be judged,’ ‘By God’s grace there will be a pile of bodies who had been run over by the (Mars Hill) bus (Mark Driscoll,)’ ‘Drag queens are groomers,’ ‘Just do God’s will and…,’ the list could go and on to demonstrate the cacophony of teachings bombarding Christians every day.
The beliefs lists are not fringe, they are very common and many of them are obviously contradictory (and/or absurd and harmful.) Amid all this competition for attention as absorbed by an individual with their own personal history who just wants to belong and feel safe the ‘voice of God’ emerges. That voice could be kind and affirming if that person had not been severely abused in the past. That voice could be stern and condemning if that person had been beaten down in the past. That voice could be critical (or ‘helpful’) as the confident, righteous Christian informs others, ‘God told me to tell you X.’ Those voices could be endlessly variable in tone and content among those who believe God talks to them. Indeed, charismatic Christianity implies that if you don’t hear God’s voice (and/or have some experience like speaking in tongues) then something is spiritually wrong with you. (This is highly manipulative.) Most people, if they’re honest, will tell you they have no idea what you’re talking about when you say God talks to us because that voice is absent. God never talked to me, and I was committed. I spent decades trying to find out what was wrong with me. Now I can be dismissed as one who never had enough faith.
The man in the pulpit says, ‘God will tell you if the criticism is valid or not.’ How are you feeling that day? Get enough sleep? Feeling righteous? Feeling ornery? Feeling vulnerable? Feeling confident? Feeling ashamed? Included in Matt’s advice for evaluating criticism was a suggestion that only one’s peers, that is, Spirit-led people, are the only ones worth listening to. People inherently know that there are ambiguities and contradictions all around the competing voices of God, but they are communally shamed away from doubting as not having enough faith as this threatens the group and their assurance that they got it right. The desire for belonging tends to drive the doubter back to the safety of the group’s beliefs. That is what God must be saying. The ‘faith’ then becomes a matter of collective belief within that faith community which pressures individuals to comply. Personal assurance that it is all going to work out (both here and eternally) amid the uncertainty which fuels anxiety is to be found within the acceptance of their tribal group. This gives the leaders of the group a whole lot of power over their own lot while further fracturing the larger society. Given that religion relies upon all kinds of unfalsifiable and/or unprovable beliefs, more scientific, evidence-based arguments are crippled when it comes to arbitrating disputes concerning fact. This thus leaves the determination of religious ‘fact’ to charisma and/or force of personality—and this is a good part of what happened to deliver the faithful to the most skillful manipulators.
Social scientists are all over this Christian Nationalism thing now. Not only what is taught in evangelical circles but how it is taught which has led to embracing widespread conspiratorial thinking.
Teaching people that ‘God’ will tell them what is right and wrong allows the culture as directed by the Christian media empire to mold what the ‘voice of God’ says. How the people feel guides what they will think and do. The conspiracy business is big business. When you teach people that they are superior to others, demonization of the ‘other’ follows. The scapegoating mechanism allows the inside manipulators to point to some outside cause of their people’s perceived problems. It works. The wolves feed. I have cited abuse after abuse, scandal after scandal, cover-up after cover-up, and set the plethora of examples gleaned from sources previously listed in other posts regarding the abuse of power by ‘Christians’ as evidence for my case. As the evidence shows, even with Christ, Christians can be desperately wicked as well.
When outsiders like me, or even credentialed social scientists, point out the evidence of widespread corruption in the evangelical world, we are dismissed as not having the spirit of God. These are some commonly appropriated scriptures to promote Christian Supremacy…
We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error. 1 John 4: 6
… you may know how one ought to behave in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, a pillar and buttress of the truth. 1 Timothy 3:15
The coming of the lawless one is by the activity of Satan with all power and false signs and wonders, and with all wicked deception for those who are perishing, because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. Therefore God sends them a strong delusion, so that they may believe what is false, in order that all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousness. 2 Thessalonians 2: 9-12
For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. Romans 1: 18
I cannot look into the hearts of the average Christian as to their intent, but I can evaluate the results of what they do and say. I suppose they mean well when they write up rules encouraging the faithful to shun secular media—that is, anything that may promote the philosophy of secularism. There are boogey men everywhere. Pat Robertson created CBN so that millions of the faithful could have ‘Christian’ TV beamed into their homes for many hours every day, so they can get nothing but the ‘Christian’ perspective of what is going on in the world. To the faithful, this new opportunity was edifying as Pat Robertson’s hatred and fear could be spread into the hearts and minds of Christians all over the world. Spreading that fear
Pat Robertson Explains How Gays Will Destroy America – YouTube
of the ‘others’ paid him very well, and it changed the world.
WATCH: The Horrible Things Pat Robertson Said In His Lifetime – YouTube
Decades of poison being poured into the minds of the faithful are now bearing violent fruit.
‘The hate never went away’: US schools face violent Pride backlash | California | The Guardian
Some are worried about the calls for civil war.
‘We Need to Start Killing’: Trump’s Far-Right Supporters Are Threatening Civil War (vice.com)
(I’m trying to remain optimistic.)
There will be no civil war over Trump. Here’s why | Robert Reich | The Guardian
Despite all this rotten fruit in which the Christians in America actively still choose Trump as the one destined to save America, despite all the fear, hatred, and all the claims of violence God has wrought in wrath upon America because of its toleration of people who do not share the values of white evangelical Christians, generously spread by CBN, Grifter Pat is commonly revered and praised as a holy man. In part, because of the Christian’s fear of the outsiders, as spelled out in Section 29:1 of the Nazarene Manual, evil, dishonest, hateful men like Pat Robertson could appropriate the name of Jesus for his own profit and to everyone else’s detriment. Like it or not, Centralia Nazarene shares the blame for it is saying next to nothing about what is going on right now in this country. Its pastor has given the church over to the culture warriors. (I documented this claim in my prior posts.) This implies to me that he approves; he just doesn’t say anything too explicit to stay on the safe side.
Getting personal, I’ll relay a story from my own life where I had been religiously manipulated. I have been estranged from my mother (dad has defied her once to come see me) for 6 years now because I, my wife, and my children asked me the morning after things blew up at Christmas if they ever had to go back. I said no they didn’t. We no longer wanted to be subject to her manipulation, cruelty, and belittlement. (My mother is very happy to tell others in my family, and whoever really, about what an awful human being I am. She told me this to my face.) From a young age, amongst all her verbal and physical cruelty, she weaponized the ’honor your parents if you want to live’ (Exodus 20:12) scriptures against me. She told me that in Old Testament times, the Israelites could kill disobedient children (Deuteronomy 21: 18- 21.) A few pastors, some Christian friends, a ‘Christian’ councilor, to whom I had confided in as an adult in pain for advice advised me that I should do the ‘Christian’ thing to forgive her and submit. She’s your mother. (And as my dad says, blood is thicker than water. I owe mom respect simply because of that, he says.) God will supposedly bless me for that submission. I did that for decades enduring one mean thing after another from her on our holiday visits. (Suffering is a good thing in the Christian faith. Builds character they say.) In contrast, I thought I tried to minimize my children’s suffering although I failed to protect them from the abusive teachings of the church because I had been crushed and duped into believing that is what faithful husbands and fathers should do. Yet, thankfully my secular, rebellious side in warring contrast and glaring contradiction raised them to respect and stand up for themselves. But I had not fully allowed myself that dignity until then. Why? (I was already beginning to journey away from the faith by then. Perhaps that helped me learn to love myself—which is generally an evil thing to do in church culture despite what they say publicly otherwise.) After that fateful morning driving back home from the assault of shaming, obligation, and veiled fury we’d endured the night before (which was amplified by the fact my daughter refused to play piano at her church,) the fact that I, without reservation, did not shame them into forgiving and submitting to their grandmother, informed me that I should allow myself to separate from that common ‘Christian’ obligation which allows controlling and manipulative parents to manipulate their children by appropriating the power of God’s wrath for themselves—with the generally enthusiastic backing of the church. This, along with leaving a faith built upon the foundations of fear and shame to the profit and power of men, is a major reason why I’ve never been happier. The church supplies tremendously powerful weapons of manipulation which can be used on people of lower status. Thankfully, the vehicle for that manipulation against me now is broken and I’m fully on the road to recovery. Hello freedom.
In regard to that ‘generally evil thing’ I mentioned above, I know we are taught that Jesus said, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself’ but that is not how things generally play out; it didn’t for me. The very hierarchal structure of the church itself is pedagogical. As a means of control, the church uses the obligation to ‘forgive lest ye not be forgiven’ of those faithful who are of lower status. Abused wives are often counseled to return to their husbands in a ‘godly’ manner in order to win them over for Christ. This happens a lot. Women have been killed after having received such ‘godly’ counsel (as documented in previous posts.) Children obey your parents—I know all about that—enough said. People forgive your pastors for covering up those crimes among your leadership. For example: The SBC is still resisting efforts to police themselves even after the horrific revelations of widespread sexual abuse and cover ups of those abuses.
Worse yet, it is highly likely that most SBC parishioners know little, if anything, about what is going on in their own denomination. Why would the pastors say anything about it? They could lose membership and attention for admitting to the cover ups. So the pastors remain silent, the people remain ignorant so no pressure is put on the leadership to clean up their act, and the leadership can then get away with what they are doing. THIS IS EVIL. Silence is complicity to the crime. But souls are being won for Christ, so that makes it okay.
The list goes on and on. Because of the ‘lower status problem’ people of lower status taught to endure abusive conditions tend to think of themselves as not fully deserving of love and respect like other people must be. The general culture of shaming and obligation greatly exacerbates this problem. The one good thing Matt said in his critical people sermon by relaying the ‘oxygen mask’ story (i.e ‘Put the mask on yourself first before helping others.’) But it didn’t go near far enough to address the balance of power issues which support abuse which is very common. As I get into addressing specific things said in the sermon, I’ll flesh this out a little more.
Commentary on Prayer
28:05 ‘…may we be a light to Lewis County…’
“White Christians, still 72% of the population in 1990, now comprise just 42%. Christians of color make up 25% of the country. And the unaffiliated (‘nones’) have grown to 27%.”
Rachel K. Laser. Church & State. Vol. 76. Number 6. Pg. 3. (June 2023.)
Yet, from the pulpit the preacher proclaims that God is doing mighty things to build his church. When confronted with the actual dwindling numbers the response is typically that the forces of evil have taken over America because everyone just wants to have kinky sex and what not. I would heartily agree that a force of evil is trying to take over America and that force can be summarized as the Christian Right. This force arose as grifters, for decades, flooded the Christian information networks with hate-filled poison for the purposes of gaining power and wealth for themselves. These men (mostly) largely knew and supported each other in the mission. (There are volumes of collected historical data from honest professionals who have documented how this happened. Some of it has been distilled in this blog from my readings.) Evangelicalism is attached to the prosperity gospel and Christian Nationalism. You are in it now, like it or not. This corrupt mess, Matt, is the light that is shining out to the world. When all these people who are ‘falling away’ see the ‘light’ of the church, they see a bunch of people who want to forcefully take over the country to use the power of government to make people comply. They see Gilead. They see anger and the ever-present threat of violence. They see oppression of the marginalized. They see cover ups and corruption. They see hypocrisy and greed. They see conditional love. You can claim to offer unconditional love, but the collective actions of the church strongly say otherwise. I’ve personally heard racist and homophobic things being said, without a tinge of self-awareness inside of walls of Centralia Nazarene. You don’t have to overtly preach it from the pulpit because Christian culture is infused to the core with white nationalism and hatred. You all call this hatred love—tough love for your own good is what you really mean. The niceties of ‘love’ are conditional and superficial. This is the light people see, Matt. Your job is to keep up the facade. But as you’ve said, ‘the loudest boos come from the cheapest seats.’ Well, this desperately wicked apostate is going to keep shouting from the nose-bleed section things the privileged folk seated in the club suites don’t want to hear…
28:30 Praying for Kids Camp… ‘may your Holy Spirit breakthrough if there are areas in their lives which need to be changed. Let that be evident.’
Translation: Evidence of transformation is submission to us.
Now to the sermon itself…
Bad Blood – Manipulative People: Mark 16:21-23 (Pastor Matt Bissonnette) – YouTube
31:25 ‘I want to control my environment.’ This is what manipulators say to themselves.
Alrighty then… Anyone who is perceived to not share your values and your eternal standing with the Almighty is to be dismissed as being wicked. Any accusation of wrongdoing, tolerating an environment of lies (that is, Trumpworld,) and/or criminal activities from the seculars is just the devil’s attack on the people of God—need some political strength to push back. Environment controlled?
Minute 36. X tries to control Y for their own benefit… the whole stinking Christian Broadcasting Network? The Council for National Policy? All those prosperity preachers working for God? The pot calls the kettle black…
37:26 ‘Manipulators greatest weapons are threats and guilt.’ You said it Matt.
How about the threat of eternal torment in fire if one doesn’t believe the right things and demonstrably shows evidence of acquiescence to those proper beliefs?
How about placing the fate of the nation on the ‘purity’ of adolescent bodies? (Dr. Dobson.) I’m sure ‘Focus on the Family’ is on the menu for a good number of your parishioners.
How about the whole book of Hosea which evangelicals teach is an allegory of God and his relationship with Israel? The good husband Hosea threatens to do all manner of horrifying things to Gomer if she doesn’t shape up—then he’ll be nice to her. Today, if this was the relationship dynamic between lovers, we’d call that highly abusive, coercive, and manipulative. It’s sick. Yet, this is okay when God does it?
38:10 ‘…if you don’t pay more attention to me, I am going to find it somewhere else.’
With all the shit going on, this is an example of what Matt calls a threat? This teaching could be easily weaponized. And that’s just it… the preaching at CentNaz is just a watered-down version of Osteen’s ‘your best life now.’ This teaching is an appeal to submission which could serve as a cover for further neglect if the neglector plays his or her cards right.
38:45 ‘If you really loved me, you’d do what I’m asking you to do.’ Yes, saying this could be abusive or it could be a completely legitimate appeal. You don’t flesh that out, hence, you’ve potential taken away an appeal to love and trust in a potentially serious situation. For example: if one spouse wants to buy something that could set the family into financial jeopardy? Such a statement could shake somebody out of doing something selfish. But you mean this in a sexual way, don’t you?
39:15 You mention spiritual manipulation. ‘If you really loved Jesus, you’d do X…’
And then you turn it into a joke. Before quickly moving on to the ‘silent treatment.’ 39:39. Not even a half a minute spent on a serious, ubiquitous issue upon which I’ve written page after page and given many examples of how it happens. No mention of the very recent, visible, and massively relevant example of spiritual (and physical, emotional, sexual) abuse which was exposed in the documentary ‘Shiny Happy People’ about the Duggar family and the IBLP. Millions have been affected by this abuse as it is spread out to homeschoolers literally worldwide. The TLC channel promoted IBLC principles via the lovable Jim Bob Duggar and his faithful, happy family to millions of faithful Christians. In short, that whole IBLP/‘Quiver full’ system of thought leads to massive abuse of people who are taught that it is God’s will that they ‘faithfully’ endure the abuse of male authority figures. Young women are especially vulnerable to this abuse which is extremely widespread throughout probably all the evangelical denominations. (Watching this will rip your heart out—that is, if you had any compassion.) I’m sure that most people watching the Duggars would not think the program was promoting the ‘philosophy of secularism’ and hence it is okay to watch as it promoted a system which creates vulnerable people who can (and will) be abused with little fear of consequence. You don’t say one fucking word about this. You don’t really want your people to understand the seriousness of the issue, do you? You don’t even want them to consider the possibility (of the problem,) do you? Why? Because talking about this very real and widespread problem would piss off a lot of your parishioners. And that would affect the bottom line in reaching people for Christ, wouldn’t it? So make a joke and redirect. Appalling.
(I know I’m not going to change anyone’s mind here, but writing is cathartic for me. It helps me process what I’m thinking and feeling.)
41:10 ‘Manipulation is dysfunctional.’ That’s what the seculars are trying to tell you about church culture and all the guilt and threats hurled at human beings. All the evidence of abuse documented by the ‘outside’ secular culture is just the devil’s attack on God’ people. The people in the church are taught not to listen to anyone who is not in God’s chain of authority. This has led to great evil as the predators in the church feed on the young and impressionable. Thankfully millions of people are starting to see the church for what it is—an institution which both promotes and hides abuse.
41:18 ‘(Manipulation) is not the way designed us to be in relationship with one another.’
I know you all don’t see the glaring irony, but I do. Although I no longer believe in inerrancy, I still am very much aware of what is written in Bible and know tons more about how it was put together than the average Christian. The reason I see it as ironic, is that even though the Bible does not speak with one voice, a very sizable portion of it depicts God as an abusive husband. The Bible is chock full of horrifying threats. How this whole mess wraps up is supposedly revealed in the book of Revelation. Revelation 1:5 claims that Jesus loves (the kinds of Christians John (who is not one of the 12) approves of.) Jesus then employs a systematic plan of terror, pain, torture, and death the likes of which the world has never seen. (And the Christians cheer. Little do they know that a lot of them don’t make either. But let’s keep that part quiet and point elsewhere, shall we?)
Threats, guilt, and obligation are the weapons men employ to control other people. The Bible was compiled by men—men chose what it would include. Throughout history, men have fashioned Gods in the likeness of themselves—mean, horrible people seeking control other and to sanctify their actions.
Perhaps the one shining light was a poor man who went by the name Jesus who preached a message of mercy and standing up for the oppressed. Perhaps the closest thing we have to knowing what happened with him is recorded in the Gospel of Mark. That Gospel told a story in which, from beginning to end, none of the ‘insiders’ ever ‘got it.’ (Later scribes changed it to include a more fitting, appropriate ending which upended the author of Mark’s point. Scholars can prove this.) In the Gospel of Mark, the only people who understood who Jesus was (and I still say is) were the outsiders—even the guy in charge of nailing Jesus to the cross. That brilliant irony has been obscured by Christian arrogance—to fashion a God more suitable to us which eventually, true to character, ends up being revealed in the graphic horror of Jesus’ actions against John’s enemies in the Book of Revelation. So much for ‘love your enemies.’
Minute 43. Matthew 16:22. ‘Took him aside…’ Is this to suggest that groups can’t be manipulative? Hogwash. Groups have far greater power for manipulation than (most) individuals do. Individuals can either use the mysterious force of charisma (that I don’t understand) or formulate an argument. Groups wield the narrowness of groupthink, the authority of popular belief, and the force of peer pressure.
44:34 When you can’t say no? Aren’t Christians really into obeying ‘authority’? Just ask the ex-IBLP people about saying ‘no’ to someone higher up the chain of command in that ‘godly’ culture…
44:55 When one always feels guilty around a certain person? Agreed. However, all the social pressures of a group can rain down massive guilt down upon one who is not compliant with the group’s values.
46:03 You feel ultimately responsible? Maybe. Depends. Are you?
46:30 When one compromises their values to please others? Please look at the plank in you own eyes. Example: Christianity seeks to use government power to force others to comply with ‘Christian’ values.
47:05 There it is… the sex stuff. In the context of premarital counseling where the pastor takes it upon himself to pry into other people’s sex life: ‘I thought you were committed to saving yourselves for ‘biblical’ marriage.’ First of all, self-righteous prick, it’s none of your business. You are appropriating the authority of God for yourself here; this is manipulative because you do not wield God’s authority though you pretend to. Secondly, ‘biblical marriage’ is a man-made, patriarchal, and oppressive institution. Thirdly, ‘purity culture’ hurts people. It can cripple people’s sex lives even in marriage because of all the shame generated by the thought crime of lust which is all supposed to magically right itself on the wedding night. It all too often doesn’t. Purity pledges do not work. Pregnancy and STD rates are significantly higher in abstinence-only environments, so you’re hurting people that way as well. (Speaking of ‘controlling the environment’… No pot calling kettle black there, right?) How many young people get married before they are mentally and emotionally ready because they are horny? Lots. How many divorces result? I don’t know but Christian divorce every bit as much as seculars do—if not more. In Christian purity culture it’s not what’s inside that matters, but outside appearances to make yourselves feel better. Purity culture is shit through and through.
As Matt continues with his righteous sexual shaming story, he gives a little tell concerning the expectations of purity culture when he says, ‘I suppose it could be her,’ in context of his ‘don’t you love me, we’re good, right?’ example of sexual pressure. In practice, in the purity program, females are expected to be the gatekeepers of sexual purity because boys are ‘Wild at Heart.’ They are the one who take the blame for being temptresses. It’s a fucking oppressive trope which is highly oppressive to young women trying to figure things out. All to make the righteous happy, that’s what matters. Fuck the people who must bear the burden the righteous have placed upon them.
Joshua Harris, author of ‘I kissed dating goodbye’ has much to say about the expectations of purity culture and how it damaged his life and the lives of countless others. I strongly recommend getting his testimony on the matter.
49:00 ‘I submit my heart to God alone.’ How pious! Question: How does one understand when he or she is being manipulated by others when that same one exists within a system based upon manipulation? Getting out is not easy even after figuring it out.
50:00 ‘Don’t know if I’d call them Satan right off the bat.’ Aww…gee…thanks…
51:00 ‘… I feel like your breaking fellowship over a minor issue…’ Minor to you. Those same people who have their undies in a bunch because a women teachers and preachers in the church claim the same Jesus you do. Why doesn’t Jesus fix that little issue, Matt? Jesus fixes everything, right?
53:40 ‘…just protecting the sheep…’ The open misogynists feel the same way. They too feel they are acting for ‘an audience of one’ as you put it.
54 God told me… Just what is God’s will? There is a blatantly obvious problem with all the different Jesus people have serious doctrinal issues with different Jesus people while amid all these disputes are a bunch of people who claim that God speaks to them. They all believe they doing God’s will. That is the fundamental problem with requiring the proper authoritative beliefs to escape the fires of Hell.
55 Manipulation…sin of idolatry? I agree. What that make the millions of people working their own angles in the church then?
56:23 ‘I’m a good Nazarene so I don’t know how to dance.’ Flunked the exam? Appearance is what matters.
57 ‘…learn to trust God…’ Yep. He’ll tell you straight up. I’ll say it again, Matt, you are in the business of making slaves because you teach people that the voice in their head, which is generated by a whole host of influences I wrote about earlier, is the voice of God. That’s abusive.
58:15 ‘…dance into the hands of God, not this pastor, or that church…’ Here you are denying the very thing you are doing. You are telling your people to dance towards that little voice which shaped and formed by innumerable (which includes what you say and do,) often contradictory factors and claims which bounce around in the Christian universe. You’ve abandoned them to the vast corrupt system as you give the ‘voice’ authority.
The one-hour mark—getting tired. ‘…not going to allow others to dictate my relationship with God…’
But aren’t you dictating when shaming horny couples or sticking up for women preachers?
1:04 ‘My relationship is on Christ and Christ alone.’ On pleasing people. Galatians 1:10.
I march to my own drum as I now embrace the ‘philosophy of secularism’ which, at least on part, assumes that all people have equal rights.
1:05 ‘Manipulation is driven by fear.’ I totally agree. If love drives out fear, then the church needs a whole lot more love. We talk about the necessity of ‘law and order’ (while embracing a man who sees himself as fully beyond the law.) We do this because we want to protect ‘our way of life.’ One of your parishioners admitted this to me; didn’t have any qualms about it at all—honest truth. I don’t recall the Jesus of Mark’s Gospel teaching us that the goal is to protect ourselves from others. Yet that is what the church is doing. I’ve previously and extensively listed evangelical attitudes toward people who are not them. It is very ugly. The more evangelical one is, the more he or she will fear the ‘invasion’ of our national border. So much for sticking up for the oppressed. People in the church fear God’s wrath and embrace grifters, like Pat Robertson, who give them someone to blame for their problems. Despite all the freedom we enjoy, the people of the church are constantly told, and hence popularly believe that they are being persecuted. The church is infused with martyr complex. Fox News, common choice for the faithful, teaches them regularly to fear immigrants and frequently appeals to their sense of persecution—all for the almighty dollar. Evangelicals in generally fear LGBTQ people as they often believe, as they are taught, that the ‘toleration of evil’ will (and has) brought the wrath of God upon us all. Thus they don’t have the right to live their own lives as they deem fit. The church is driven by fear because its teachings are delivered amongst threats and a mountain of guilt all the while claiming to alleviate those things. It is because of Christian’s fear that most of the church culture is militant, defensive, and political.
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind.
Christian culture is anything but kind. The church accuses people of doing the kinds of things they themselves are doing. They call people ‘groomers’ when they themselves support a culture which does everything it can do to protect the sexual abusers in their own ranks. They are doing this to protect the children? Hogwash. Mass shootings with AR-15’s is now a routine thing. Guns are the number 1 killer of children. But we won’t stand for any restrictions, because Christians, deep down (and increasingly openly,) reserve the right to the weaponry to set things right. (As the Neo-Nazi militia groups keep growing.) It’s not about protecting kids. After decades of violent rhetoric bombarding Christian minds, Christian influence and rage has spread to the broader culture; things are getting more and more openly violent.
‘The hate never went away’: US schools face violent Pride backlash | California | The Guardian
Surprise. Surprise.
Final Thoughts
1:11 Every situation is different. This stuff is hard to preach. Trust God. Yada-yada…
More troubling than some of the things you said, was what you didn’t say regarding the elephant in the room (if anyone is paying attention.) Most people tend to not see things in which they haven’t been prompted to look for such a thing. (Refer to the ‘man in a gorilla suit amongst people bouncing a ball around’ experiment I mused on in a previous post.) My point is that in your sermon, you gave a bunch of mundane, domestic examples of manipulation. This trains people about what to look for. As such, you kept your congregation in the dark about the dumpster fire burning in the middle of the sanctuary. You are effectively saying ‘Nothing to see here, move along, send money. We’re saving souls for Christ.’ This is much the same as the SBC pastors saying nothing about the cesspool that is their system, so that too few will be informed to reform that system; and hence, the abusive system can keep rolling on.
Bravo.
